Fred, We have a problem
by Chris-TheNinja8D
Summary: One of Hogwarts most strange and unexpected couples... Draco thinks they might be in big trouble. Slash - BoyxBoy! Now rated T, since it isn't really graphic :


_Fred... We have a problem._

I had just finished unpacking the last things, when my brother came barging into the room with a scowl plastered on his face.

"Hey, what's up?" I asked him, as I pulled my last extra cloak out from the suitcase. He had his arms crossed.

"Fred, you know that I truly accept your sexual orientation, and I love you just as much as before. You also know that your choice of partner is not quite the right decision though. But apparently he just came back, and he is very eager to... _talk_ with you." My twin finally said, glaring. I sighed, as I stood up.

"Thanks, I really appreciate your support." I said, as I passed by him on my way out. I was having doubts again, about my "boyfriend", all thanks to George. I knew it was hard on him, and I understood that, I just wished he would let it be. But it killed me that we had so many fights about it, and it was making me wonder if it really was worth it.

I waved at Hermione as she came passing by, just as I entered the common room. I couldn't help but smile at the thought that she had been my first 'real' crush. That was before I realized I didn't swing that way.

"Hey, Fred have you seen your brother?" She asked me, looking up the stairs to the boys' dormitories, where I had just come from. I shrugged.

"Depends on which one you need." I replied, even though I already had it figured out. George and Hermione had been going out for about a month now, and Ron was still pissed about it. What a family we have... Hermione sighed, and I regretted my words. She already felt guilty enough.

"Hey, don't let your _lover_ wait." George said, rolling his eyes, as he came down the stairs. I really was getting fed up with him, and it hurt me. After all, he was my twin, and we'd been best buddies since before we were born. "Hey, baby." He added as he noticed Hermione. Her sad look disappeared, as she wrapped her arms around his neck and he kissed her, making her blush. She still hadn't got used to being so "intime" in public, but oh well... It is Hermione, after all. Such a thing takes time to get used to.

I decided that I had seen enough, and besides: I had someone waiting. I crawled out through the portrait of The Fat Lady, and the first thing I noticed was the blonde hair and grey eyes that belonged to the person, waiting for me there.

"Took you a while." He snorted, as I finally reached him. I rolled my eyes.

"George is still not over _us._" I replied, as I wrapped my arms around his waist. It must have shown that it really hurt me, because Draco leaned in and gave me a soft kiss, before looking me directly in the eyes.

"Give him some time, he'll get used to it." He assured me. I smiled.

This was one of the few times Draco had shown his soft side. He usually pretended to be tough, but I knew he cared more than he'd ever show. I leaned in and kissed him again.

"Don't you hang around here all day; I bet you have better things to do." The Fat Lady suddenly interrupted us, sounding slightly disturbed. I couldn't hold back a giggle, as Draco turned completely red from ear to ear. He still wasn't used to the fact that we were the strangest, and most unexpected couple at Hogwarts.

"Well, I bet you have better things to do too.. Or wait, you're a portrait. Too bad you only can hang around, huh?" The Slytherin said coldly, making The Fat Lady open her mouth in surprise.

"How dare you?" She started, but I wasn't in the mood for it, so I grabbed the hand of my lover and pulled him with me.

"Come on, I really ain't up for anymore argues today." I pulled him with me, and soon we were outside the castle. The ground was still covered by snow, and our steps left dirty footprints against a background of pure, glistening white.

The castle looked amazing at this time of the year, but all I could concentrate on was our breaths that were visible in the cold weather.

"You know, there was I reason I needed to see you. Not just because I missed you, there's also something I need to talk to you about." Draco suddenly broke the silence, keeping his eyes on the ground.

I looked at him, but it was impossible to make eye contact, since he refused to look up. I sighed, squeezing his hand.

"Wouldn't it be easier to talk about it, if you told me what the matter is?" I suggested, still looking at him. A blush crept it's way onto his face.

"Stop mocking me... It's actually pretty serious, you jerk." He mumbled, blushing even more.

"Well, then I guess you should tell me." I offered. "You know you can tell me anything."

"No... It's too embarrasing..." He whispered, shooking his head violently. I raised a brow at his suspicious not-very-Malfoy-ish act. I stopped walking, still holding his hand. He stopped too, one step ahead of me, without looking up.

"It isn't very easy to solve it, if you don't tell me what it is Draco." I said, pulling his arm so he stumbled into my arms.

"Wh-what are you doing, you moron?" He shrieked, trying to get free, but I kept my arms locked around him. "Cut it off, someone could see us!" He continued, making me snort.

"Everybody knows. For god's sake Draco, you just kissed me in public." I said seriously. "And besides, I'm not letting you go before you tell me what's wrong."

"I... I can't!" He exclaimed, trying to break free but without any luck. I wasn't particularly strong, but I was stronger than he was. "You'll just laugh at me."

"Draco..." I sighed once more, annoyed that it seemed to have become a habit. "If I promise I won't laugh, will you tell me then?"

"You need to keep that promise then!" He growled. I nodded shortly, before realizing he couldn't see it. I let go off him, nodding once more for him to see.

"I will." I said, getting a bit unsure about the whole affair. He was acting out of character, and it was starting to making me think that something was really wrong.

He took a deep breath, before raising his head and looking me straight in the eyes.

"Fred... I think I might be pregnant."

I blinked a couple times, before bursting out in laughter. I watched how he turned completely red in a mix of anger and embarrassment, and I tried to control myself, but it was really hard.

"See? I said you would laugh!" He yelled furiously. I continued trying to get rid of my giggles, and luckily I succeeded in the end, but he was already on his way. I ran to catch up with him, grabbing his arm.

"Draco, I'm sorry. I really am... But that's just the stupidest thing I've ever heard!" I managed to get out between giggles. He pulled his arm out of my grip, looking angrily at me.

"It is? How else would you explain this?" He pointed to his belly, where there was really nothing to see. I scratched the back of my head, finally realizing how deadly serious he was.

"Uhm, what exactly am I supposed to see?" I asked, looking him in the eyes.

"I've gained weight." He claimed, but I really couldn't see much difference.

"Draco, you do realize that you're a guy, right?" I asked, feeling kinda awkward. How in the world could he really believe that he was pregnant?

"And so? My mother told me, right after she found out about our relationship, that she'd put a spell on me that would make me pregnant if I ever had sex with you, and now, three weeks after you convince me to do _it_, I'm gaining weight!" He explained madly. I shook my head, sighing for the god only knows which time this day.

"Draco, believe me: You're not pregnant. Your mom said that just so you would refrain from having s..."

"Don't say that word!"

"...x with me. There's no such spell, and if there was, it would surely be illegal. Wizards really aren't as tolerate about homesexuals as the muggles are. And by the way, why would your mother do that anyway? She probably knows you would do it anyway at some point, and I doubt she wants to have a part-Weasley grandson." I told him, ruffling his hair. He looked like he was thinking it all through. Then he looked at me again.

"Well, how do you explain the extra weight then?" He asked suspiciously. I couldn't help but laugh again, as I pulled him into a hug.

"Draco, it's Christmas time for Merlin's sake. Everyone gains a little this time at the year. And besides, it's not like it's gonna hurt you." I added, kissing him on the forehead. The blush was only faintly visible, but it was still there.

"You... You're probably right." He muttered, leaning into me. I smiled to myself, about this whole situation. Well, it had certainly taken my mind off of... _things. _"Anyways, dinner's gonna be served soon, and I'm starving... Wanna go back inside?"

He looked up at me, nodding slowly. "But first, come here." He whispered, making me bow my head to reach his level of height. He kissed me on the middle of the lips, passionately but quick. Then he pulled away with a smile, and took my hand, and together we walked back to the castle.

So, I apologize if this was too strange for you xD Much can be tolerated, but I think I just might have crossed the line between weird pairings and unrealistic pairings x3

Sooo, yeah... There's probably a need for some changes, but I have only beta read it myself. I've been in contact with my mentor, but she hasn't really given me any feedback yet, and since the deadline is tomorrow, I guess there's not really anything to do, but upload it.

Sorry if I disappointed you .


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